Friday, May 20, 2011

Peony & Paeon

I have been pretty scattered this week and then today, Oriah Mountain Dreamer, author of "The Invitation" and other incredible thing posted a comment on the "Peonies" poem by Mary Oliver. I was planning to insert it into this post, but my grasp of the technology left me with a post of a link only. Sorry.

I quote the poem because it is beautiful and timeless. And so is the story of Paeon, the character from "The Iliad." As you probably know, "The Iliad" is one of the oldest and greatest stories about human conflict we have. It is the epic retelling of the Trojan War, actually a minor skirmish that took place around 1225 BCE between the Greeks, headed by Agamemnon and the Trojans whose prince, Paris, has stolen the Greek beauty Helen.

The tale is told as the struggle between heroes on either side, and the gods tht championed some of them against others. Paeon's role is as healer of the gods. Specifically he came to the aid of Ares, the god of conflict and Hades, the god of the underworld, or The Shadow. He did this with an extract from the peony, which is how he got his name. And how it is that we adopted the peony for our logo. Any of you who have received a business card from us have seen it.

We see the role of Paeon Partners as parallel to that of our namesake. The workplace is certainly the source of trial and struggle between people and these conflicts usually work out based on power. The person with the most power wins and the other(s) lose. Unfortunately this outcome may or may not serve the enterprise, which is the purpose for these people to be together in the first place.

We don't have any floral extracts or other potions to work with, we have coaching principles which always call for building two things: communication and trust. This is nothing simple or easy, and it takes time and commitment. But we believe that we can help find common ground and real community with each other when they stay focused on principles, without denying their feelings or judgements. We observe that most means of gaining skill at being good team members requires people to check the most fundamental parts of themselves at the door.

This is not a convenient or clean way to solve a problem. When I cut out the part of me I don't want, let's say my ego, the offensive (?) part of me may go but what goes with it? Probably the most creative and imaginative part of me. How else could I have created this overblown image I have of myself? And it's the same part of me that solves real problems and sees the path to clarity. My fellows need these things just as I need the offensive parts of them. Because that is how we are different. And how we add up to more than the sum of our numbers.

We think that the goal is to bring all parts of everyone into the room and give them the chance to be shown. Then they aren't hidden under some cover that slides away when the wind shifts and no one knows how to deal with it then.

We weren't taught to act this way. Therefore we don't know how and we don't trust it will work. Okay, tht's the truth. And we aren't afraid of it anymore. We have taken the risk to look at this way. And, as messy as it is, we have come to love the results.

What scary things have you tried that fooled you into seeing things in a new way?

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